When I got into work this morning I was still feeling sick from this weekend. Something viral I guess….but I still am not doing well…and now my tooth has been hurting all day. I have to leave work early for a funeral for a friend of the families tonight for Mark, my father new him for years and works with his wife Erin. They have a son Vaughn who i believe is about 18 months and was a miracle for the couple! He unfortunately had a tragic motorcycle accident earlier this month.
I am also on nerves this week as the b/f is coming with to the family reunion at Cutty’s in Iowa. I am really excited especially since this will give him a bit more interaction with my kids which he has had like NONE of and we have been together for almost a year (minus the couple month hiadus … its on the 27th MY BIRTHDAY of this month). What worries me is this side of the family…they are the REALLY CHRISTIAN family side … they dont seem to judge but i know they are not happy about my divorce..at all. Oh well, thats why we are staying OFF SITE at another camp ground 
Money…as usual sucks…i should get my stimulus check in the mail today and then its gone…but not before I buy the b/f his anniversary present. His buddy has one similar and has been dying for one seeing that he always leaves his wallet in his car and then just takes out whatever he needs. I am going to get him the dark titanium one and get his initials engraved in it. Luckily i get my renters credit (another 900) back in about a month here … just in time to buy Vikings VS Colts tix! YAY
SO i had this awesome dream the other night that i am beginning to think wasn’t so awesome. I dremt that the b/f finally proposed to me with the most gorgeous ring i had ever seen…i woke up that morning in his arms with a huge smile. Now i am panicking though…i am not ready to be married to him yet and no babies thats for sure….what am i doing, what am i saying? i want all of it with him of course i do but i am panicking again and i dont know why. Someone please help me 
